Saturday, February 23, 2013

My children 13, 16 and 18 have refused to come with me (their father) for any visitation since my ex and I separated and Divorce

Q:  My 13 ,16,18 year old kids refuse to come with me when I go to pick them up for my scheduled visitation. They say they are not ready to see me or are not comfortable etc. their mother says she encourages them to come but can't make them.

They email me the day of visitation saying they won't go and not to even come by or they tell me they aren't coming when I arrive.

Do they have a legal right to refuse? There is no history of abuse, drugs , alcohol etc. is the mother in contempt? I want to email them back to let them m ow the legal ramifications of their refusal but wa t to be sure of the law In NY.

The mother will shut the door on me and tell me there is nothin g she can do and that she 'encourages them to go'. I have filed police in scent reports and have set a court date in family.

A:  David's Answer:  First, you should keep a paper-trail of your efforts to visit with them. Second, you should do some soul-searching as to whether your prior actions were at all to blame for their refusal. If their refusal to visit is completely unjustified, then you can file a separate petition to terminate or reduce child support. Finally, the Court loses jurisdiction to rule on visitation matters at age 18, so he Court would only have authority to address issues with the 16 & 13 yrea old.   -- David Bliven, Westchester Child Custody attorney (

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